Script
Chapter 1 Opening Credits'' [radio transmission sound] Noob Army':' This is the Noob Army refugee vessel Statesman. We are under assault, I repeat, we are under assault - The engines are dead, life support failing. Requesting aid from any vessel within range. We are 22 jump points out of Noobland. voice becomes more desperate and pleading Our crew is made up of Noob Army families, we have very few soldiers here. This is not a warcraft. I repeat, this is not a warcraft! the ship, Master Pro walks among the bodies of dead NoobArmians. DatboyCookie Badly wounded, reaches out as he would stop maw as he passes, but lacks the strength steps over them with no mind as he speaks, as if they were scattered pieces of dirty clothing on a bedroom floor M'''aster Pro] Hear me, and rejoice I had the privage of being saved by the great titan... You may think this is suffering... no its salvation universal scales tip toward balance because of your sacrifice smail''e…stabs one of the remaning lingering no''obarmy even in death you will become children of ThanOOF stands with the Evil Order. He watches ThanOOF, shrouded in darkness and light, a vague silhouette. '''ThanOOF: [Looking out the large window we saw at the end of Thor: Ragnarok'']'' I know what it's like to lose. To feel so desperately that you're right... yet to fail, nonetheless. Santa Noob by the neck of his breastplate. Santa Noob struggles feebly. It's frightening. Turns the legs to jelly. I ask you, to what end? Dread it. Run from it. Destiny arrives all the same. And now, it's here. Or should I say... I AM. holds up his hand to reveal the Infinity Memelet, which already hosts the violet Thanos Car Meme. Santa Noob':' being held by ThanOOF with one huge hand wrapping around his head; blood drools from his mouth You talk too much. ThanOOF: Awesomeaaden The Discord, or your brother's head. I assume you have a preference. Evil Order heft their weapons or smirks, as appropriate Santa Noob':' Oh, I do. Kill away! face expresses surprise briefly before presses the Memelet to Santa Noob's left temple. The Thanos Car Meme glows brightly. Santa Noob screams hoarsely. Awesomeaaden':' losing his cool demeanor almost immediately as Santa Noob suffers, and breaks after only a few moments ALL RIGHT, STOP! Santa Noob: We don't have the Discord. It was deleted on Noobland. glances at Santa Noob like he knows something he doesn't. He lifts his right hand into the air and the Discord reveals itself'' Santa Noob':' You really are the worst brother. AwesomeAaden':' holding the Discord out to ThanOOF and advancing I assure you, brother... the sun will shine on us again. Thanos: Your optimism is misplaced, Bacon Noob. Loki: Well, for one thing, I'm not Bacon Noob. And for another... We have a King Bighead. looks to his right just as a yellow and very angry mass slams into him. Awesomeaaden dives for Santa Noob, pulling both of them out of the way as the Discord skitters across the floor, and the King Bighead charges ThanOOF. The King Bighead pummels ThanOOF, forcing him backwards and shoving him into the wall of the ship. Master Pro stops The Leaders of the pros from interfering. Master Pro':' Let him have his fun. pries the King Bigheads's hands away; an expression of surprise and fear crosses his yellow face. After several hard blows, ThanOOF picks up the King Bighead and slams him to the deck, defeated. Santa Noob slams a metal bar across ThanOOF's back to no avail, is kicked across the deck by ThanOOF and is promptly bound in metal debris by Master Pro to keep him from interfering further. Thatboywithacookie':' prays Allfathers… let the dark magic flow through me one last... time. summons the spookiness, which carries the King Bighead away; he meets Santa Noob's eye. ThanOOF: That was a mistake. borrows Tinpot's glaive and stabs Thatboywithacookie through the heart, twisting the blade in the wound. Santa Noob':' NO!!!''' ThanOOF kills Thatboywithacookie '''You're going to die for that! Master Pro':' Santa Noob's mouth with his telekinesis Shhh. Master Pro':' before ThanOOF, offering up the Discord My humble personage… bows before your grandeur. No other being has ever had the might, nay the nobility, to wield not one, but two Infinity Memes. The universe lies within your grasp. crushes the Discord, revealing the blue Thanos Shoe Meme. He blows some of the fractals away, fingering the Meme between his thumb and index, before placing it on the memelet, and is momentarily rocked by the surge of energy that pulses as the meme seats in its setting. ThanOOF: There are two more memes on Earth. Find them, my children, and bring them to me on Oofland. Bacon King: kneeling Father, we will not fail you. Awesomeaaden':' from behind the Evil Order cheerfully If I might interject… If you're going to Noobland, you might want a guide. I do have a bit of experience in that arena. ThanOOF: unimpressed If you consider failure experience. Awesomeaaden':' I consider experience, experience. Almighty ThanOOF, I... Awesomeaaden... Prince of Noob Army... significantly at Santa Noob Memeison... The rightful King of cheeseheim... God of Mischief... do hereby pledge to you, my undying fidelity. Noob squints and notices a dagger materialize in Awesomeaadens's hand. Awesomeaaden braces himself, thrusts upward with lightning speed and attempts to stab ThanOOF, but is frozen in place by the Thanos Shoes Meme's power before the point could strike home. ThanOOF: "Undying." You should choose your words more carefully. twists the dagger out of Awesomeaaden's hand with his right hand, then takes hold of Awesomeaaden's neck with the memelet and lifts him to eye level. Awesomeaaden struggles, kicking, as his throat is squeezed. He makes eye contact with Santa Noob before he increases his force on Awesomeaadens's neck. Awesomeaaden':' up on fighting against ThanOOF You will... never be... a legend. crushes Awesomeaaden's neck, killing him ThanOOF: over and drops Awesomeaaden's body in front of Santa Noob No resurrections this time. [Thanos raises the gauntlet, sends violet Thanos car fire through the remains of the Statesman'', and uses the Thanos Shoe Meme to teleport away with the Evil Order.]'' Santa Noob':' No… Awesomeaaden… Noob is released from his bonds. He crawls over to Awesomeaaden's body -- which, unlike in The Spooky World, has not returned to its elon form -- and lays his head down on Awesomeaaden's chest, shedding tears for all that he has lost. The ship explodes. Bifrost continues its journey, bringing the King Bighead across space to Noobland. Chapter 2 (not finished) Sanctum Sanctorum, New OOF City] Noob, Master of the Mystic Arts, proceeds down the main steps of the Sanctum with Timmy. Magic Noob':' in casual Noobica clothes Seriously? You don't have any money? Timmy':' as Wong is always dressed Attachment to the material is detachment from the spiritual. Magic Noob':' I'll tell the guys at the deli. wryly Maybe they'll make you a metaphysical ham on rye. Timmy':' Oh, wait, wait, wait, I think I have 200. Magic Noob':' Dollars? Timmy':' Rupees. Magic Noob':' Which is? Timmy':' Uh, buck and a half. Magic Noob':' What do you want? Timmy':' I wouldn't say no to a tuna melt. crash-lands through the Sanctum stairs. The Cloak of Levitation swirls around Magic's shoulders immediately. King bighead':' ThanOOF is coming. He's coming... Magic Noob':' a look with Timmy, and now fully in his mage attire Who? Screen: Noobven''gers: Infinity War'' Park, New OOF City, day. Tony Stark and Pepper Potts walk on having a conversation. Blind Cat':' Slow down, slow down. I'm totally not kidding. Alem':' slightly and talking over him You're totally rambling. Blind cat':' talking over her No, I'm not. Alem':' Lost me. Blind Cat':' Look, you know how you're having a dream, and in the dream you gotta pee? Alem':' Yeah. Blind Cat':' Okay, and then you're like, "Oh my god, there's no bathroom, what am I gonna do?" "Oh! Someone's watching." "I'm gonna go in my pants." Alem':' Right. And then you wake up, and in real life you actually have to pee. Blind Cat: Yes. Alem':' Yeah. Everybody has that. Blind Cat':' Right! That's the point I'm trying to make. Apropos of that, last night, I dreamt, we had a kid. So real. We named him after your eccentric uncle. Uh, what was his name? Alem':' in understanding Right. Blind Cat':' Cloakedyoshi! Cloakedyoshi Alem':' So you woke up, and thought that we were... Blind Cat':' Expecting. Alem':' Yeah. Blind Cat':' excited Yes? Alem':' her head No. Blind Cat':' I had a dream about it. It was so real. Alem':' If you wanted to have a kid, you wouldn't have done that. unties his jacket sleeves and taps blind's chest attachment Blind Cat':' I'm glad you brought this up, 'cause it's nothing. It's just a housing unit for nano particles. Alem':' It's not helping your case, OK? Blind Cat':' No, no, it's an attachment, it's not a- Alem':' insistently You don't need that. Blind Cat':' I know. I had the surgery. I'm just trying to protect us. The future usses, and that's it. Just in case there's a monster in the closet, instead of, you know... Alem: Shirts? Blind Cat':' You know me so well. You finish all my sentences. Alem':' You should have shirts in your closet. Blind Cat':' Yeah. You know what there should be? No more surprises. We're gonna have a nice dinner tonight. Show off this Harry Win-stone. Right? And we should have no more surprises. Ever. I should promise you. Alem':' Yes. Blind Cat':' I will. kisses alem. Noob comes through a portal. Magic Noob':' Blind Cat, I'm Magical Magic Noob. I need you to come with me. Oh, uh, congratulations on the wedding, by the way. and Alem are understandably shocked. Blind Cat':' I'm sorry, you giving out tickets or something? Magic Noob':' We need your help. Look, it's not overselling to say that the fate of the universe is at stake. Blind Cat':' And who's "we"? King Bighead':' from behind Magic Noob Hey, Blind. Blind Cat':' surprised Bighead. King Bighead':' Alem. Alem :''' Hi. Blind Cat:' You okay? ''gives Blind a desperate hug, not answering. After everything he has been through, we understand. at the Sanctum Sanctorum Timmy':' magic to show the universe and five out of six Infinity Memes From the dawn of the universe, there was nothing. Then, boom! The Big Bang sent six elemental Meme, hurtling across the virgin universe. These Infinity Memes each control an essential aspect of Meme. Magic Noob':' Meme lights up as Magic names them. Thanos Shoe. I don't feel so good. Thanos Car. Thanos Kirby. I guess this is your home. And OOF. [ Magic opens the Eye of Agamotto, revealing the I don't feel so good meme emitting emerald light.] Blind Cat':' attentive Tell me his name again. King Bighead':' ThanOOF. He's a plague, Blind. He invades planets. He takes what he wants. He wipes out half the population. He sent Awesomeaaden. The attack on New OOF. That's him. Blind Cat':' to himself This is it... What's our timeline? King Bighead: No telling. He has the Thanos Shoe and Thanos car memes that already makes him the strongest creatur''e in all of robloxian, imagine if he had all sixs memes blind. '''M'agic Noob: He can destroy life on a scale to a amount hitherto undreamt of. B'l''ind Cat: Leans against a cauldron stretching like hes going out for a run] did'' you seri''ously say "hitherto undreamt of"? 'M'agic Noob: are you seriously leaning against the cauldron of cosmos" Blind cat ''': Is that what this is...? [The Cloak of Levitation smacks Blinds arm surprising him.} M'a''gic Noob: offended himself I'm going to allow that. If ThanOOF needs all six, why don't we just stick this one down the garbage disposal? 'M'agic Noob: no can do. Timmy: We swore an othe to protect the thanos Kirby meme with are lives. Blind Cat:' And I swore off dairy, but then, Ben & Jerry's named a flavor after me, so... Magic Noob ':' Magical Nooby Hazelnut Ice Cream Blind Cat':' It's not bad. Magic Noob':' A bit ''chalky. Timmy: "A Hunka-Hulka Burning Fudge" is our favorite. . Bruce Banner: That's a thing? Tony Stark: Whatever. Point is: things change. Doctor Strange: Our oath to protect the Time Stone cannot change. This Stone may be the best chance we have against Thanos. Tony Stark: And still conversely, it may also be his best chance against us. Doctor Strange: Well, if we don't do our jobs. Tony Stark: condescending ''What is your job exactly, besides making balloon animals? '''Doctor Strange:' calm ''Protecting your reality, douchebag. ''seriously can't tell who's sarcasm is better. Bruce Banner: Okay, guys, could we table this discussion right now? The fact is that we have this Stone. We know where it is. Vision is out there somewhere with the Mind Stone, and we have to find him now. Tony Stark: awkwardly Yeah, that's the... thing. Bruce Banner: What do you mean? Tony Stark: Two weeks ago, Vision turned off his transponder. He's offline. Bruce Banner: What? Tony, you lost another super bot? Tony Stark: I didn't lose him. He's more than that. He's evolving. Doctor Strange: Who could find Vision, then? Tony Stark: to himself Shit. the other men in a normal tone Probably Steve Rogers. Doctor Strange: [sighing in exasperation] Oh, great. Tony Stark: Maybe. But... sighs Bruce Banner: the events of the Avengers' Civil War Call him. Tony Stark: It's not that easy. God, we haven't caught up in a spell, have we? Bruce Banner: No. Tony Stark: The Avengers broke up. We're toast. Bruce Banner: surprised and slightly let-down ''Broke up? Like a band? Like The Beatles? '''Tony Stark:' Cap and I fell out hard. We're not on speaking terms. Bruce Banner: pleading ''Tony, listen to me. Thor's gone. Thanos is coming. It doesn't matter who you're talking to or not. ''hesitates, before pulling out the cellular phone Steve mailed him, muttering 'flip phone'. It seems as though he brings it everywhere, always ready to call his lost friend. Before clicking "Call", he pauses, distracted by an unusual rumbling. Tony Stark: Say, Doc, you wouldn't happen to be moving your hair, would you? Doctor Strange: up at his forelock fluttering Not at the moment, no. looks at the Hulk-made opening through the ceiling and sees debris flying by outside. He exits the Sanctum through the front door and scans the chaotic surroundings, the camera shaking around in this following long take to illustrate the chaos -- people running and screaming in alarm, traffic becoming impossibly tangled, a litter-filled wind like a nor'easter's. A woman falls nearly at his feet and he helps her up. Tony Stark: You okay? woman ignores him and runs away. A car crashes in on a pole behind Tony. Tony Stark: Help him! Wong, Doc. Bruce Banner: Go! Got it! Tony Stark: on his sunglasses F.R.I.D.A.Y., what am I looking at? F.R.I.D.A.Y.: Not sure, I'm working on it. Tony Stark: Hey! You might wanna put that Time Stone in your back pocket, Doc! Doctor Strange: of spells are readied around his forearms ''Might wanna use it. ''mechanical hum grows louder as Tony approaches the intersection. As he turns the corner, he sees a huge circular ship floating over Bleecker Street.